Recovery means I do not spend hours in the gym!


 

With my anorexia came an obsessive exercise disorder. I would spend hours in the gym on cardio machines every day, never taking a day off.

I remember that Christmas would be the worst for me, I would push myself harder and harder to burn calories in anticipation of the food to come with the festivities. The only way to stop the negative thoughts in my head from screaming at me would be to workout, and workout and workout.

When I was in recovery I avoided going to the gym as I knew that it would trigger my old behaviors. This avoidance was a crucial part of my recovery but was not full recovery.

Full recovery looks nothing like avoidance. Now I can go to the gym and not even touch the cardio machines, just do yoga or some weights. I get bored within 2 minutes if I do get on a cross-trainer and have not touched a treadmill in years, not because I am am not allowing myself to, but because life is simply to short. These days there is nothing that I would rather do less than run on a treadmill.

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About Tabitha Farrar

I work as Head of Marketing for a software startup in Boulder. As a recovered Anorexia sufferer, I advocate for proper understanding of eating disorders in my spare time. On that note, I wrote a book about my own journey into eating again called Love Fat.

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